Away Awhile Journal Entry 24

Journal Entry 24

September 28th, 2003

"Stupid Farangs"

Farang: common term for "foreigner" in southeast Asia.

On the plane from Myanmar to Thailand, had another of those "Who Is Kim?" moments (refer to 'Kim,' Rudyard Kipling). It's both nice and disturbing at the same time.

Landed in Bangkok. This time, I didn't take the air-conditioned tourist bus out of the airport, instead opting to walk out of the airport and catch a local bus on the busy highway. The vehicles, the shops, the clothing...where was I? Anyway, my plan was to get my Vietnamese visa, and buy a plane ticket to Ho Chi Minh City (Saigon). Twenty-four hours later, I began making my way to Laos instead. But back to Bangkok...

Either this place changed since I was here last, or my view of it changed after spending a lot of time in Asia. It seems so modern. I couldn't believe it. Comfortable. I didn't like it so much. I spent about thirty hours there, long enough to get a visa and a bus ticket, then I split. Overnight bus ride to Chiang Mai. Reclining seats. A/C. Finicky tourists that bitch about absolutely everything. Where am I? For cryin' out loud, we had working A/C, wide, reclining seats, and a WC on the bus! When's the last time this happened?

Chiang Mai also full of people, and its just a city, so I split for Pai, a touristy little town in the hills that happened to be almost empty 'cause it's low season. Perfect. Met some expats living there and hung out for a couple days. Took a brilliant Thai cooking course. Tubed down a river. Had some beer. It was good. But Laos was calling me. After a day aboard buses, and a trip across the Mekong River, I was in new territory again.

In Myanmar, had my first experiences with the "sawngthaew." It's a pickup, converted to a passenger vehicle. It has a topper, and two benches going the long way. In Laos, these are the only means of public transport in many places. First stop for me was Muang Sing. To get there, it was an eight-hour sawngthaew ride on an unpaved road. The scenery was absolutely spectacular. Lush green jungle. This rough road and the simple bridges seemed to have no place here. After a one-night layover in Louang Namtha, it was a further two hours to Muang Sing, about a dozen kilometers from the Chinese border in northwestern Laos. Ate stuffed grilled frogs at the market here. Also decided to try the charcoaled rats...but thought it better to wait until the next morning when they were "freshly cooked." Next day, they had the same rats sitting out. Cancelled this plan.

This region of Laos is in the highlands and populated by Hmong people. And opium cultivation. Did a lot of walking up in the hills, passing through villages. They have gates before the villages with crude stick/bamboo symbols hanging everywhere, to ward off evil spirits, I think. They have a very "Blair Witch" feel. Nice area. Rains every day. Cloudy most of the time. But decent food and a place in the bungalow to hang a hammock in between short hikes.

Then, off to Muang Ngoi Neua, a trip that involved one truck ride, two sawngthaew rides (one with two pool tables and a dozen people in the back of an S10-sized truck), one bus ride, and a boat ride, all over the course of thirty hours. This is a nice little village with no roads leading to it. It's on the Nam Ou River. Celebrated my 27th birthday here with some Austrians I met up with. Explored a cave in the morning where you had to swim through a stream to get back into a huge, completely black chamber. Just the day before, a Japanese guy emerged from three days inside--his flashlight had broken. We were smart and carried two. That evening, had fried Mekong seaweed (brilliant!) over a Beerlao (the local brew).

I had had a brainstorm, a week back, about how cool it would be to buy a boat and float down the Nam Ou River, join the Mekong River 120km downstream, and get to Louang Phabang, the next destination on my agenda. The Austrians thought it seemed a good plan, so after two days in Muang Ngoi Neua, we purchased a boat for $60 and started down the river. Soon we were spinning downstream in the flat-bottomed boat that was impossible to keep straight...three white guys wearing conical wicker hats, feet kicked back, lazing the day away.

We began in the middle of the afternoon, and there was to be a full moon that night, so we just kept going. All night. It was awesome. The landscape is riddled with karsts--limestone rock formations that bulge out of the earth, often encroaching on the river's edge. The combination of the full moon haloed by wispy clouds, the eerie landscape, and silence occasionally broken by frogs, monkeys, or the odd echo off a stone cliff...made for a night that I won't soon forget. The next morning found us about 80km downriver from where we started. Ask me sometime, and I'll tell you why I don't recommend buying a boat in Laos, and how it came to be that two friendly Lao people became the benefactors of our boat, and how I lost a sock.

Louang Phabang (aka Luang Prabang) is the former capital of Laos. Lots of temples and monks and an old Royal Palace which had, as part of its museum, a 1957 picture book of the "tourist sights" of the Soviet Union. But back to the city. It borders the Mekong River. Nice night market with lots of good food. Herbal sauna. Picturesque place that makes a nice hanging-out-stop on a trip. Did a day trip to Kouang Si, a waterfall with dozens of tiers. Beautiful place, and a bit of a wonderland. You could climb all over, and walk through streams and pools. Fun fun.

Moved on to Phonsavan, the nearest town to the Plain of Jars. The Plain of Jars is a collection of thousands of big monolithic jars that populate hill tops all around this region of Laos. They average about 3' (a meter) in diameter and 4' (1.3m) high. Usually found in groups of 10-50, I think.

More recently, the Plain of Jars was the site of a lot of bombings during the US's "secret war" in Laos, part of the battle against the spread of communism in the 60's and 70's. Clusterbombs were the weapon of choice, and there are still millions (!) of them in the surrounding countryside, undetonated. Phonsavon town has an orphanage for kids whose parents have been killed by either war or unexploded ordnance. In this area alone, about forty people are killed every year (39 last year, 17 so far this year), mostly farmers who hit the grenade-sized bombs when working the rice fields. Also victim are the local children, who can earn 600 kip (about six cents) per kilogram of war scrap metal, and will take the risk to collect it.

There was a Soviet presence here till 1987, and locals were made to learn the Russian language and communist theory. An overturned Russian tank and an airstrip with rusting MIG fighters still offer a reminder. Sorry for the history...I try not to say anything too thought-provoking or, so if I ever slip up, I apologize.

Needless to say, this is an area where you take a guide with you (in fact, it's required) and keep to the beaten path, which has been cleared of ordnance and declared safe.

Moved on to Suanhin, an off-the-beaten-path place with monolithic tombstone things reminiscent of a small and disorganized Stonehenge. I was travelling with a German, and we had to walk about 22 km (13 miles) to see this. On gravel and dirt paths, mostly. In flip flops (the only "shoes" I had those days). That'll give you blisters, no matter how used to them you are, unless you're a Nepalese porter.

Stayed in a strange little village, apparently very close to a socialist "re-education" camp, where government installed speakers blared out what they want you to hear, at various times of day. No restaurants, so we made instant noodles.

Next day, hitched to Xam Nua, then Viang Xai, close to the Vietnamese border, to see the Pathet Lao caves, where the Communist leaders hid during the American bombings. Ask me sometime why we spent 2 1/2 days doing nothing at the "Swampside Guesthouse" and didn't see the caves which is why we were all the way up there in the first place.

I decided to bust from Laos, so I got on a bus to the capital of Vientiane. After a long detour around a broken road, stopping to help an accident, and driving through the night, the bus arrived in Vientiane--25 hrs later. Vientiane is a nice little city. It's pretty small, especially for the capital of a country. Fitting for Laos though. Spent 1 1/2 days there, getting sorted. Picked up some expired Vegemite, which is one of the world's truly great food accessories. Then I was on a bus to the Vietnam border. Got there at 3 am, so we had to sleep on the bus till it opened. Clearing the Laos side was a piece of cake. Clearing the Vietnamese side was not...

"Why, drat it, Huck, it's the stupidest arrangement I ever seen. You got to invent all the difficulties. Well, we can't help it, we got to do the best we can with the materials we've got. Anyhow, there's one thing--there's more honor in getting him out through a lot of difficulties and dangers, where there warn't one of them furnished to you by the people who it was their duty to furnish them, and you had to contrive them all out of your own head." (-Mark Twain "Huck Finn")

Away Awhile is hosted by Josh Trutwin.